


You feel like home

by Maxyfairy



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Best Friends, Cuddling, F/F, First Kiss, Fluff, No Beta, Roommates, Sharing a Bed
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-13
Updated: 2020-08-13
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:56:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25884709
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Maxyfairy/pseuds/Maxyfairy
Summary: It's Jackie's birthday in a few hours
Relationships: Jackie Cox/Jan Sport, jankie - Relationship
Comments: 3
Kudos: 41





	You feel like home

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys. This took me for real like three weeks to write. It may be a bit confusing but I hope you like this. 
> 
> Songs that inspired this work:  
> Drive all night - Celine Dion  
> California king bed - Rihanna

Jackie laid in the bed staring at the white ceiling. In less than two hours it's going to be her birthday and it was the first time since she could remember that she would be celebrating it without Jan and it made her sad. Jan was her best friend since forever and roommate since they went to college. When they were growing up they were neighbors and spent every waking hour with each other. Their friends still joked that you wouldn't get one without the other. They had sleepovers every night and would share a bed. It was normal for them. Their parents never had anything against it. When Jan came out to Jackie as gay and later to her family they still slept in one bed. Jackies parents were extremly homophobic so they never told them. Jackie came out a few months later only to Jan and they still shared a bed every day because they were best friends and like sisters. Jackie sight. Her feelings for her best friend changed over the years. She loves Jan and not in a sisterly best friend kind of way. Jan was everything to her and she misses her badly. Jan with her long silky blonde hair, doe like brown eyes that Jackie can't say no to and her smile was like sunshine and lit up the entire room and made her eyes sparkle. But now the sunshine was gone because Jan wasn't in their apartment.  
They moved together to save some money when they were in college and still lived in the small apartment in New York. They both had their own rooms but still shared one bed and switch each night. One night Jan would sneak into Jackies bed, the next night Jackie would creep into Jans room to lay next to the smaller one. They always woke up cuddling, but it wasn't awkward because they always were quite affectionate and touched each other constantly. Whether they hold hands or put a hand on an arm or shoulder as comfort. If Jackie was honest, she couldn't sleep without Jan next to her and she hated herself for it. Everything would be easier without her feelings towards her best friend.  
Jan was visiting family in New Jersey and would be back in two days. She was already gone for five days and Jackie hadn't really slept. Jackie's friends were worried about her because they never saw the persian woman so tired and exhausted with dark circles under her eyes. Of course none of their friends knew that they slept in one bed. They just thought they were really close.  
Lately Jackie felt that even though they slept in one bed and cuddled they were miles apart. Her best friend kept more to herself and wasn't her usual bubbly self anymore. She was more in her thoughts and Jackie couldn't figure out why. She didn't want to pressure Jan into telling her, so she didn't ask. If Jan wanted to tell her, she would, right?  
Jackie stood up, tightly wrapped in a blanket and went in the large window in the open concept kitchen and living room space. It was her favorite place in the apartment, right after Jans bed. She had a good view of the streets of New York. The city wasn't as alive in the night as it was in the daytime but she could still see the cabs passing by and the flickering lights from clubs and bars. She wrapped the blanket a bit tighter around herself and sight. How would she survive her birthday? She is sure her parents will call but that's about it. She never made plans for her big day. It was always only Jan and her hanging out, watching a movie and talking like every other day because spending time with her was present enough. Jan. It's redicolous how much you can miss one person. Jackies eyes filled with tears. She never shows how vulnerable she can be in front of other people because she hates to look weak. With Jan she could be vulnerable because she trusted her and she knew Jan understood her. The tears began to run down her cheeks and the persian woman shook her head. She felt dumb. She shouldn't be crying over her best friend and crush, who was gone for a few days and wouldn't be there for her birthday. Jackie didn't know how long she just stood there, watching the now blurry city and letting the tears roll down her face

The lights were switched on abruptly. Jackie turned around and almost fell because of the blanket. She lets it slip down to the ground. Her eyes went wide. In the door stood Jan haunched over, hands on her knees. "I-I made it." The blonde panted to herself, still out of breaths, not noticing the other woman by the window. "Jan." Jackies voice was small and a little broken. Jans head snapped up. Her head was read from running up the stairs. "Oh my god Jackie." The blonde rushed through the room and pulled the brunette in a tight embrace. She had her arms around Jackies neck and Jackies arms wrapped automatically around Jans waist. "Hey, what's going on, why aren't you sleeping?" Jan asked concerned, cupping Jackies face and wiping away the dried tears. Couldn't sleep.", Jackie murmured, playing with the ends of Jans hair. They just stood there for a few minutes taking the other one in.  
"Why are you here? Aren't you supposed to be by your family?" Jackie questioned not looking into the smaller ones eyes. "Well", Jan began still stroking Jackies cheeks, "there is this pretty girl, whos birthday is tomorrow and I wanted to surprise her, so I drove all night to be there before the clock counts twelve." The blonde smiled softly. Jackie blushed. "I missed you Jacks. Being there without you was hell."  
"I missed you too Jannie. It wasn't the same without you here." Jackie admitted. They again just stood there until Jan broke the silence. "Did you really thought I forgot your birthday Jackie? You're the most important person in my life." Jan looked sad. Jackie hated herself for doubting that the girl in her arms would forget because of course she wouldn't. "You're my person too. I'm sorry I got in my head again." Jackie tears up again. "I'm just so tired. I can't think straight anymore." Jan chuckled about the straight part but also looked concerned. "Hey please don't cry again." It breaks Jan's heart to see the taller one so distraught. Something wasn't right and it wasn't just the lack of sleep. "Want to tell me what's bothering you?" She asked. "Everything's alright." Jackie attempted to dodge the topic. "I can see how hard you're trying to not tell me something. I know you better than you know yourself Jacks. You're hiding something." Jan tried to coax. "Just let it be. Please Jan it's better this way." Jackie pleaded with watery eyes and let go of Jan just holding her hand. She looks so small and vulnerable it scared Jan. Jackie had to hold up something big or she would have told her. They told each other everything, well almost everything because Jan hadn't told one thing to Jackie. Jan was to scared to tell Jackie about her feelings. She knows that Jackie noticed that she wasn't behaving like she used to but her best friend never commented about it. Jan knows she isn't fair but she really wants to know what's going on with the taller one. Jackie didn't understand why Jan was so persistent. The other one was clearly hiding something as well but she didn't want to push it.  
"Come on let's go to bed." Jackie said. "Alright." Jan gave up. "Go ahead I'm going to change and than join you." She squeezed Jackie's hand, went to took her luggage into her room and quickly changed into some pyjama shorts and a top. As Jan entered Jackie's room she saw the persian woman sitting against the headboard, staring emotionless at nothing and not noticing that she was there. Jan carefully crawled into the bed and straddled Jackie's thighs. The older one flinched at the contact. Her mimic changed from scared to relieved to guilt and her eyes got watery again. "I'm sorry. Normally you're the cryer." Jackie said rubbing her eyes. "Hey Gorge, I don't know what is going on in your head but I'm here if you need anything." Jackie wrapped her arms again around Jan's waist and put her head on the blondes shoulder. "I know, thanks Jannie." She mumbled and yawned. "I love you." Jackie sight and automatically pulled Jan closer. Jan snuggled even closer. It wasn't uncommon that they said they love each other but the way Jackie said it was different. More meaningful. "I love you too." Jan said and placed a light kiss to Jackie's temple. Jackie stiffed at the touch for a second but than melted into it. Because she was so tired and she missed her, she had the need to tell Jan all the things she loves about her. "You're so sweet Jannie, and so kind and so talented and so beautiful and so gorgeous and everybody loves you and you shine when you enter a room and you give the best hugs and your laugh is infectious and ..." Jackie rambled into Jan's hair. Jan giggles softly cupping Jackie's face. "Okay. I know I'm pretty great but you are all the same things too, you know. You're such an impeccable human beeing I sometimes wonder how you are real." They stared deeply into each others eyes. Something shifted. They couldn't say who kissed who first. Suddenly their lips touched, it was just a soft press and it felt like coming home. They didn't deepen the kiss just slowly moved their lips together. When they pulled apart they both beamed. Jan's gaze flickered to Jackie's alarm clock on the night stand. "Happy birthday Jacks." And kissed her again.


End file.
